What is Emotional Maturity?

Very few things are cut and dry, this or that. 

Emotional immaturity comes from the inability to process emotions + have awareness of other people’s perspectives.

Many of us are emotionally immature. We live in a society/in homes that don’t teach us how to regulate our emotions. Or, how to have any awareness of how another person might perceive the world.

This results in:

– rigid/black + white thinking
– feeling shame or fear around conflicting emotions (ex: feeling bad about loving a parent while also having experienced trauma from that parent)
– thinking everyone must agree with you to share the same viewpoint
– shaming yourself for thinking thoughts or feeling emotions that aren’t ‘good’ or ‘happy’
– believing that someone’s disapproval means something about who we are
– being shut down to anything that doesn’t validate your own emotional experience

All of us can practice our way to more emotional maturity. This comes from understanding:

– there are multiple realities

– your reality is always valid— simply because you have it

– We can choose how we engage with those around us

– We can have our own thoughts/beliefs even if people disagree + allow the same to others

– We can have many different emotions about things at once

– We can create our own meaning or narratives around what we experience at any time.


Vikas Bajaj

Counseling Psychologist

Everything is not always as it seems. Please check in on the ones you love. 💙⁣
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