Blaming yourself for not handling things better – Without acknowledging all the difficulties/challenges you are facing and the strength it takes to survive them.

Criticizing yourself for being too sensitive or emotional – Without checking in on what your feelings are, the place they come from, and the validity of them.

Shaming yourself for being “too needy” – Without acknowledging that you have needs that are likely unmet and it is this that drives the behavior you are shaming yourself for.

Justifying another’s toxic behavior by taking responsibility for it yourself – E.g. “They didn’t mean it, I know they love me… I just have to not ………….. and this won’t happen again”.

Criticizing yourself for not “getting over” that traumatic incident already – Without acknowledging the complexity of trauma, its profound impact, and the patience/time needed to work through the healing process

Affirmations for those who gaslight themselves:

My feelings are valid

I am not too much, I am enough

I am doing better than my mind tells me

I am not responsible for another’s toxic behavior.

Everything is not always as it seems. Please check in on the ones you love. 💙⁣

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Vikas Bajaj

Counseling Psychologist